The Caine Mutiny

1954 boat movie

Rating: 14/20

Plot: Rub a dub dub, a bunch of men in a tub. Mother-fixated horndog Ensign Keith hops on board the titular rickety ship. The first guy in charge (Lt. Capt. Sergeant Commander) is replaced by a new guy who looks and acts suspiciously like Humphrey Bogart. It doesn't take long for the rest of the crew to figure out that this guy is not only a stubborn and unfair disciplinarian, but probably batshit insane and a little yellow. After a series of questionable decisions, the titular mutiny occurs during a storm. Then, there's a court martial.

Here's an action drama with the rawness and depth you'd expect from a Disney production. Maybe that's just because of Mickey Mouse's pal Fred MacMurray, but more than likely it's something else. Stuffed to the gills with big, big music and images of actors almost looking like they're actually on a boat, this sounds and looks like an enthralling dramatic adventure story, but it's really pretty flat. The characters are types, and the acting, including with Bogart's Queeg but especially with Robert Francis's Keith, is just ho-hum, exactly what you'd expect instead of being challenging or creating characters with depth. The story's fine, but it just seems like nothing fits right with this movie, like a Japanese man singing the blues. My favorite scene:

(Keith and his special lady friend are standing outside saying romantic things to each other, things that were apparently written by somebody who has never heard real people talk and gets his inspiration from romantic movies from the 1930s. Keith kisses his special lady friend on the forehead.)
Special lady friend: Keith! There are people.
Keith: I don't care. Let them look!
(More forehead kissing ensues.)
Special lady friend: It's getting late.
(Scene fades. And the next shot is a waterfall the following morning. It's symbolic.)

That kind of seems sexually explicit and borderline offensive because of how the rest of this movie feels. And that's really the main problem with this movie. It's ok. It's butterscotch pudding. If you really want to eat some pudding, butterscotch pudding is fine. But it's a boring pudding that nobody really wants. If you have to watch The Caine Mutiny, it's fine, but I don't see anything here that makes it seem like something that anybody really wants.

Yet another Cory recommendation! He's apparently a big fan of butterscotch pudding.